Entries this day: tunnel

tunnel

4:20pm CST Monday 23 January 2000

I had to do it.

Highway 59 is under construction (it's being widened) near my house. A section of 59 travels through a very short canyon type thing below ground level, allowing some residential streets to cross it with no interruption.

One of these bridges (the one called Hazard Street Bridge) includes a big pipe/tube thing 24 inches in diameter that carries who knows what across the bridge.

Because the bridge highway is being widened, a new longer pipe sits beside the old pipe, ready to go into place to carry who knows what across the longer bridge.

Construction has always intrigued me; I love watching the big machines scoop loads of dirt, or shattered sections of concrete, or pour new concrete, or lift giant sections of highway or whatever.

Today as I drove by, I noticed that there was no such activity going on at this bridge. I decided to take a long around.

Saw some dirt, a hole or two, big giant posts to hold the new pipe, and I saw the new pipe. Nice bright turquoise, 24 inches in diameter, and pretty dang long. I peered inside and could see the light from the other end. It wasn't a perfect circle of light; the ends were slightly bent downward:

 ________________________________
/                                \

But there was light and the tube looked clear of obstructions. Hmm.

I walked along it a bit, banged on it some, gave it a good push.. seemed quite solid and didn't move at all. Hmm.

I walked the entire length, watching traffic pass by underneath the bridge, watching for anyone watching me, watching my brain in general. Hmm.

I got to the other end and peered in again. It looked clear from this end as well, although this end was resting on some plywood (instead of spilling into the air on the first end), making the exact entrance a bit less than 24" in diameter. Hmm.

I looked around a bit more and checked the time on my cell phone. 1:55pm. My brain was in overdrive.

"Awright. Probably nothing bad will happen. There's no dogs or monsters in the pipe. Plenty of air in it. No one is watching."

"Are you crazy? What if I get stuck? How would anyone find me? What if the workers come back right now and install the pipe with me in it? They would never hear me screaming!"

"Man, it's Sunday! No one is going to install this pipe right now, c'mon. Plus, what if you don't do it? You will never know. Never never never."

"So? I will still be alive. I can imagine what it would be like - tight squeeze; not really a big deal."

"So do it! You're only 30, man. This opportunity might not come again soon. You gotta do it while you're young!"

"Awright."

So I wriggled my way inside.

Hmm. Not as much airflow as I might have guessed.
Hmm. Not as much room as I might have guessed.
Ow, this little gravel shit is sharp on my knees.

I began in prone position, pulling myself forward on my elbows and toes. That took a significant amount of energy and I quickly began to feel hot and almost suffocated. I looked ahead. Long way to go. Behind me was the entrance bright and inviting.

I forged ahead. I found that I could barely crawl, bringing one knee forward at a time. I could not kneel on both knees; there was not enough room. I ambled through a spider web. Eww. I hadn't thought about that. There seemed to be no spider nearby, nor any insect victims. Bluh!

The inside of the tube was coated in fine dust, with not so fine gravel collected at the bottom. Most times the bottom was relatively clean, and I could do my flattened crawl, brushing my hips and butt against the top of the tube with each step. I closed my eyes as I paced myself through. I visualized myself suddenly at the other end.

Suddenly, the gravel on the bottom ground into my knees. I had to resort to my elbows and toes, and I kept my eyes open.

I looked up. Looked like about half way. I felt somewhat hot and had to gently control my breathing to keep my perceived oxygen level correct.

I thought about resting for a second now that I was halfway through but my brain jumped to the grandest irony: what if I fell asleep and woke up just before I was somehow trapped and being exactly in the center, neither end would be closer for my escape!

I kept crawling. Kept brushing my hips against the top. Occasionally brushed gravel off my knees with my hand. I began to sweat. Fine dust turned into mud on my arms and hands. My glasses began to slide off my head. Kept crawling.

I looked up. Almost there. About 25 more feet. Kept going until finally I poured myself out of the end onto the ground.

Got up. Oh my gosh I am dirty! I uselessly brushed myself off and produced a cloud of dust when I sat in my car.

"Sorry, Scott."

Drove to work to clean myself off. I was closer to work than to home, and I really felt nasty driving my car like this.

Washed my arms up to my elbows and took my shirt off to soak it in the sink. I felt relatively certain no one else was in the building, so I took my shorts off and began to brush them off with a wet paper towel.

Began to wash my knees. I stretched my right knee up into the sink and brushed it off gently as the water rinsed all the dirt off. Then something kinda poked my hand. Holy cow what is this?

A staple was fully stabbed at an angle into the skin over my kneecap. EEEK!!!

Felt a bit creepy as I pulled it out. Tiny puncture wound. Little blood. Umm.. yes tetnus shot is up to date. Shudder eewww.

Washing the other knee off was significantly less traumatic, except my cell phone rang.

Dug through my shorts pockets to find it.

"Hello?"

"HI. Where are you?" It was Wende.

"I'm at work. In my underwear washing up in the bathroom."

[pause] "Any particular reason why?"

I gave her the brief version of the story.

"Rob, I think we'll need to talk."

She had called to see if I had called her, but I had not so we hung up. I finished cleaning up then got re-dressed and went into the office.

Patrick was there. I told him a longer version of the story. He understood the "have to do it; only chance I'll get" kind of thing.

Went home and here I am.

With Love
- Rob permalink