Entries this day: Dream i-group

Dream

am 10 July 2000

(dream)

for a while I dreamt I was typing all this. trying to memorize my dream while thinking I was typing, but not typing. I was sleeping.

melted into sleep and then another dream.

Setting up our new house which was one story and I had Wende's three witching balls which (no pun intended) are designed to capture evil spirits who get entranced by the spiderweb like strands of glass inside the ball.

I was blessing one of the balls for my room and Wende came in and we talked about where to put them

scene melted into assembly of youth watching movie about a man who had 10000 dollars and was tyring to make himself popular. A confrontation in the movie and then movie over, youth walking from the big movie screening room along an outdoor hallway like a school and one youth lit up a cigarette.

same energy of the movie, but at camp outside. and the scene transformed into outside at a campground, with Maia and Tiffany at SWUUSI probably, and I was in a car maybe Mr Van at the bottom of a ramp and a the man from the movie was at the top of the ramp in a car as if he were about to drive down and kill soemeone, but we didn't know who. The sense was that this was a soap opera movie, so his plan was clear (kill someone) but we didn't know who. I yelled up to him HI! and he asked yelled back a question and I climbed up the structure to see what he wanted and he asked if i had ever driven down this big ramp and down the hill and i said i had done it on skates before.

I confronted him; who are you planning to kill or planning to and he halfway confessed and I said don't do it and got down and then he drove to the bottom of the the ramp (not down the entire hill) and he stabbed my cousin Peter in the upper right shoulder blade.

I was all "Call 911!!" and I called 991 at first and the operator said, "you dialed it wrong" and hung up and then I dialed correctly and the guy answered "fire, police or ambulance?" and I was all, "um.. police" but they took forever to answer the phone. As I was waiting for them to answer, two people were tryng to pin the guy down.

I went over (they never answered) and someone was using stakes, like long tent stakes, they were pinning his jacket to the ground. Jason was going to kill him by stabbing trhough the back of his neck, and I yelled, NO as the guy was now calm.

I had a thick cord cord thing and was going to restrain his head against the ground like a big horse bit and he was all very compliant, but kept getting out from under it. I had this cable thing stabbed significantly far into the sand, and pulled hard against his mouth and then was stabbbing it into the sand on the other side, but he kept getting out somehow. The entire time I was talking to him, all, "sir you need to lay back down" and he would comply, talking about some other aspect

stabbing the cable arms' length into the ground I finally was starting to get the guy caught for good and use coat hangars on the other side to make it tighter. problem solved essentially and I woke up

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i group

9pm Monday 10 July 2000

In my men's group tonight, I expressed an inability to relax, because I think I must do something in order to be of value for the world.

The fouled logic goes:
If I don't do something, then I'm not productive
If I'm not productive, then I'm not helping society
If I'm not helping society, then I might as well not be here

I recognize the value to my soul of relaxation / meditative time, so I set the intention to relax for 1 hour... on Thursday.

I will call or email Dan to tell him of my success.

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