Entries this day: Dream Marta

Dream

8:00am CDT Tuesday 30 July 2002

(dream)

In a hotel type thing, and Will Robidee, the general manager of KTRU was in charge of taking care of stuff. I took an elevator up, and couldn't find the button to go up, so I flipped a little switch and it went up beyond the level of the roof. I was really scared that I might fall, but it didn't and I was able to get it back down to the level of the roof. I told Will what happened, and he showed me how to fix it.

- - - -

I was back at work, or I had to bring something back to work and the door was unlocked though I used a key to get in, like I still had a key, and it appeared to work, but it only worked since the door was already unlocked.

Got inside and remembered that I didn't work there anymore. Dave and Dennis came to see who was intruding, and were all, "oh, it's Rob" and went about their business for a second before coming to say HI.

I felt really sad during the dream. Everyone was dressed nicely and having fun, and there were some cute cute girls that I had worked with at Telecheck there. Some YRUUers were there as well. I wasn't willing to express my sadness there so I gave them the peace out sign and left.

I wanted to get out as quickly as possible, but I took the elevator too far down and had to climb up a flight of stairs to get to the parking lot level. I was opening crying and when I got near my car I was going to kick a kickball in a venting anger type way, but I chose not to at the last second and it just sorta bounced away.

Marta

8:02pm CDT Tuesday 30 July 2002

Marta and I just had a heart to heart talk while cuddling in her bed after reading the play _Old Wicked Songs_. We agree that we cannot be sexual so early in our relationship, but that I really want to and don't want to and I really love her and cannot be committed to her and all this apparently paradoxical stuff.

I still haven't told her that my heart is with Sally mostly, or maybe Bronwyn, and that I want to be fuck buddies with Janette. But I have told Marta that I cannot be monogamous with her.

Me an Marta's relationship has included cuddling under covers, with her robe coming open enough for my knee to touch her pubic hair, and kissing and biting tongues, but not full blown tongue kissing. And yes to nibbling fingers and licking fingers and necks and biting necks and ears. Nice stuff that traditionally has made me want more.

We're about to go eat.