journal
all ![]() | Rob is 20,117 days old today. |
Dec 2004 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08 09 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
Feb 2005 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08 09 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 2004 jan feb mar apr may jun jul aug sep oct nov dec
2006 jan feb mar apr may jun jul aug sep oct nov dec |< << more >> >| |
Entries this day: Helpful bike_dummy gateway_data late_dream me_and_cesar_email nother_try_gateway_data one_more_gateway_data Helpful 11:21am JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 I think I will go to one of the tsunami decimated areas in March. I imagine there will be plenty of work still to be done. In the past, I have felt... ooky about not going to help when fucked up things have happened. Of course I recognize that I'm not going now, but there is ..... what is it..? this rule that says my committment to work is more important. Beneath that is a fear around money, that if I don't keep my word, then I'll lose the possibility of coming back, etc.. There is also an aspect of saying bye to my peeps and my stuff; this is a similar issue to what I went through when I left my apartment in Houston. (Jen points out that there's also a likelihood that if I (she) went *now*, we would just be an annoyance: more people who need food.) Okay, so let's plan this: I'll leave on 26 March, Colleen's birthday and two years to the day that I left Dallas for Japan. I need to get rid of my junk: ship some stuff back to the US (to janette and Maggie, probably), toss a lot and give away the rest locally. There are four knotboards in my room; a couple of them are pretty big. I'd like to sell those via an online auction. I should just hook that shit up and quit worrying about maximizing my profit. There are lots of letters and shit that I want to keep, but will probably never process. I should also oops I forgot what I was going to say. - - - - I scoped a google answer about how to volunteer. permalinkbike dummy 6:14pm JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 Crap. Mimibike was towed again today. I parked her near the station. I remained in a relatively chipper mood, knowing I was about to pay 2500 yen (for the third time) for a bike I bought for 3000 yen in the first place. Even learned the name of the guy at the place. (What a crap job he must have.) Shimizu. My good mood was lost when, as a result of having paid 2500 yen for the bike, I couldn't afford 540 yen worth of groceries. Fuck. permalinkgateway data 7:43pm JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 CD/track Wave III / Freedom 1: Lift Off body position flat on back with legs bent CD player Panasonic SL-CT510 headphones Audio-Technica ATH-T3 ambient temperature 17 C and rising clothing socks, red flannel pants, thick long sleeve shirt, YRUU hoodie, Hitomi-knit cap working nostril(s) both, sorta emotional state calm, a tad tired physical tight neck muscles head fine stomach a little ooky pain/soreness phone/door off/locked time allowed all night ambient light almost none ambient noise gas heater date/time 7:48pm JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 location Millenium House, room 20 8:56pm JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz woke up in the middle of the second exercise. fell back asleep and woke up just now. permalinklate dream 11:27pm JST Wednesday 05 January 2005 Dear Cabin 5 There is no direct correlation between the activites in your neighborhood with the consumption of mushrooms for medicinal purposes. If this seems shocking, it should be. We provide a service to help relieve this problem. However, we have not heard from you regarding this matter. Shall we remove you from our list? Don't wait too long. Cabin 6 Someone like Jesse and another guy and I spent several minutes crafting an email that we intended primarily as a meaningless joke, but that could possibly be interpreted as real and could possibly net us some money on the net. We were in the backyard underneath a canopy type thing and directing the letter to a neighbor who lived caddycorner to us. We basically finished the letter, and the guy from whom we were borrowing bandwidth was in the booth next to the canopy and he provided for us, as a service, some printouts, which were basically printouts of versions of the document printed about once every two minutes. Oh crap; there will be no hiding our activities. Maybe we should rethink this thing. - - - - - - - - After a previous dream, I woke up feeling wow; that is really nice; we can start a large helpful program this way. janette can be there for support and this thing could really go. I should write it down. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I remembered the grandness of the dream while writing down the previous dream and wrote this to try and recover it: grand dream janette yellow blue large statelike entity with a grand pattern permalinkme and cesar email 1:31am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 Cesar to me: Hola Rob, Je te souhaite une magnifique nouvelle anne, avec beaucoup de succs et entour de le gens que t'aime ! J'ai pass les vacances avec la famille, tranquil mais maintenant il faut travailler, ... J'tais trs curieux et j'ai lu ta web, et tu parlais de runes, blank runes É Je suis aussi trs curieux sur a mais je voudrai savoir que tipe de runes tu veux, de que type de civilisation, car chaque peuple et civilisation a les siens. Ton intrt viens de tes connaissances historiques, ou ton esprit Indiana Jones reviens fort ? JÕattend tes nouvelles avec impatience et donne un salut a tout le monde de ma part, Csar Ps : SÕil te plat, redonne-moi le mail de Jeff, My reply to Cesar: Cesar! Gracias por tu email en francais. yo y ayuda de Jen leando (leer + we + past) el email. Al nuevo ano yo duerme (dormir + me + past) al 11:30pm. Mis runes son del un libro de Senor Ralph H Blum: "The Book of Runes" El libro es nuevo runes del los Vikings. El Blank Rune no es un Viking Rune, es un nuevo rune de Senor Blum. El Blank Rune es "unknowable" y "divine" Senor Blum escriba (escribir + he + past). Mis espanol es terrible, pero es mejor de aquesto. (better than I thought it would be) Gateway is a set of CDs that make up an "in-home training program for develping, exploring, and applying expanded states of awareness." "You will be gently led (via sounds and verbal suggestions) from your physical waking state into deep relaxation then to those thresholds of consciousness where you may experience profound states of expanded awareness. While in such states, one has a borader range of perceptions available with which to solve problems, develop creativity or obtain guidance. You may use this expansion and integration of personal awareness to know and better understand your total self so you might enjoy a more fulfilling life." I am using the gateway CDs as a research tool so I can learn more about what is beyond this physical world. I hope to do something good for the world in this manner. I look forward to hearing from you soon! Take care. - Rob Ima Jeff-san wa neimas. Dakara kare no email morenai. Ashta moremasu kamoshirenai. (I hope this means "Now, Jeff is sleeping. Therefore, I can't get his email. Maybe I can get it tomorrow." in Japanese.)permalink nother try gateway data 12:37am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 I've slept for a few hours. I'm going to try again: CD/track Wave III / Freedom 1: Lift Off body position flat on back with legs bent CD player Panasonic SL-CT510 headphones Audio-Technica ATH-T3 ambient temperature 20 C clothing socks, red flannel pants, thick long sleeve shirt, YRUU hoodie, Hitomi-knit cap working nostril(s) right emotional state calm, a bit tired physical fine head fine stomach fine pain/soreness phone/door off/locked (after I just sent a reply to Miho L3) time allowed all night ambient light almost none ambient noise gas heater fan date/time 12:52am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 location Millenium House, room 20 1:23am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 Stayed conscious through that one. Before he encouraged lifting in the balloon, I worked on visualizing my energy bar on and off, which, last time, seemed to induce a vibrational state for me. I felt around for a physiological equivalent to visualizing it on and off. I found something, but don't know how they correlate. My body was quite sleeping during the verbal floating suggestions, and I noticed my legs and then my arms felt that discomfortable feeling that I've associated with super exercise during the day and then going to sleep. Like my legs just want to move. Is that feeling my legs not inside my physical legs? Goodness knows I didn't exercise very much today, and I definitely know the feeling wasn't there before I started and nearly isn't there now, except for one point in my left hip. I tried visualizing my hands touching my heater, and visualized pushing myself out of body with my energy bar, and visualized tying it to a column in Musashikosugi station and rubberbanding myself over there. Neither of those things seemed to work they way I hoped they might. As the exercise started, I decided I wanted to post the email I received from Cesar in French, and my reply, partially in Spanish, and a tiny bit in Japanese. I made a mental note for myself to remember that. That worked. I also made a mental Focus 12 request to remember the dream I had a few hours ago. permalinkone more gateway data 1:55am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 CD/track Wave III / Freedom 3: Vectors body position flat on back with legs bent CD player Panasonic SL-CT510 headphones Audio-Technica ATH-T3 ambient temperature 20 C clothing socks, red flannel pants, long sleeve shirt, SWD YRUU hoodie, Hitomi-knit cap working nostril(s) right emotional state calm, a bit tired physical tight back muscles head fine stomach fine pain/soreness none phone/door off/locked time allowed all night ambient light almost none ambient noise almost none (I turned my heater off) date/time 1:56am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 location Millenium House, room 20 2:31am JST Thursday 06 January 2005 I was awake for a lot of that, but not the end. I didn't seem to be able to move/go/perceive in the different directions suggested. At the very end he was all, "... consciousness. Do it now." so I woke up. Groggy and didn't want to write this, but did it in the name of science. (what does that mean? "in the name of...") permalinkprev day next day |