Entries this day: AM_dreams AM_state_of_My_Life_Address Arafat's_tomb Second_day_training So...

AM dreams

6:14am IST Monday 10 October 2005

Whole different feeling of dreams last night: being tricked into asking a muslim woman to marry me; wondering where I would live after this; learning how much I had to do before P/B 52; groveling back at Gaba for a job; lots of worry and angsty dreams.

AM state of My Life Address

6:27am IST Monday 10 October 2005

1. I am in Ramallah, a city in Palestine, and have woken up for the second day of two days training before going to pick olives with Palestinian farmers who have requested our support where Jewish settlers may be angry with the Palestinian presence.

2. I have eaten a *lot* of humus recently, but not much in the way of vegetables, and it's evident in my poo.

3. I'm trusting the universe to support me as I'm slowly releasing my belongings. The next big one to let go is my box of letters that I've been toting around but not "using" - I think it's important not to destroy them; they are good for future generations of historians; I'm thankful for the appearance of a good place to store them indefinitely.

4. I have not yet picked any olives, nor met any Palestinian refugees, nor had any real run-ins with Israeli soldiers or Jewish settlers. I don't even know if I'm using correct terminology to describe people in this confused land.

5. We will do another day of training today and then have the option of supporting the olive harvest after that.

6. I am torn between supporting olive harvest for a while and going to see what Palestinian Vision is all about. That's the NGO featuring Ramy who I met with Niveen a couple days ago, all made to click via P/B.

7. I have not made a list of things to do in a while:

   1. get my phone charged
   2. get a phone charger
   3. upload pictures from yesterday
   4. pay credit card
   5. send postcards
   6. finish _if the Buddha dated_
   7. release the book somewhere
   8. make a bookcrossing entry

8. My computer (Macintosh Powerbook G4 titanium / 667Mhz / 512 Meg RAM / 30 Gig HD / 32-bit LCD 1280 x 854 pixel resolution (15 inch?) is going strong, though missing the C key.

   My keyboard is in Dvorak layout, but I'm using it in qwerty mode.

   I like typing qwerty when in qwerty mode.

9. I don't have a girlfriend, fiance', secret lover.

10. I am learning how to release the need for such an angsty wack relationship lifestyle that I've been in, finding my spiritual core via suggestions in _if the Buddha dated_.

11. I know about 4 words of arabic. I don't have clear plans to learn it, though I still think it would be pretty neat to know.

12. There are hints in my brain that I might have done myself a disfavor by giving myself such a short time here in Palestine, but I haven't really discerned where they are coming from.

    My sense is I'm just worried about how I'll be able to survive monetarily in Tokyo for a month before P/B and then for the 52nd voyage. Where will I go after that, and I've basically promised Natalie I will apply for the 54th voyage, and parts of me really want to cause I enjoy her hugs (honestly we've not done more than that (and platonic kisses and bites))..... but I know I need to only apply if it's in my best interest otherwise.

    I love it when she tells me how much she loves my hugs. "Oh Rob, what am I gonna do without your hugs?"

    I love that. I don't want her to be without wonderful hugs.

13. Another woman ( with whom I judge I haven't gotten tooo involved) has given me food and a big closed mouth kiss on the lips, and I can easily see things going farther, but I think it would be a premium disaster in the end.

    However, there is a "however" in my brain. It's something like, "I can just see her and not get sexual;" and "though it's not *likely* she is a perfect match for me, is there any harm in dating for a bit?"

    However, however, I'm pretty sure that if I know I don't want to get way involved, I should not get partially involved, "waiting" for the right person. I will benefit more if I just live my life and get along with myself alone.

Arafat's tomb

9:42am IST Monday 10 October 2005

Sarah and I took a quick taxi ride to Yassar (sp) Arafat's tomb, which is within walking distance of this hotel. Arafat. A really famous cat who changed the world, rests peacefully guarded by three uniformed soldiers who stand sharply when visitors are present and slouchingly stand when alone.

The large grave is draped with a large Palestinian flag and a head scarf matching the one in the picture of him behind the flag. Two shoulder things are on either side of the scarf, which is folded once into a triangle.

The plot is surround by dark tile, all enclosed in a glass room with white roof and a few plants inside. Outside the room is a decent sized plot of strikingly green grass and young olive trees planted around the perimeter. Some trees are fully grown, and one or two look stubby and transplanted. Along the side and back are young trees with trunks about an inch to 1.5 inches in diameter, and maybe about 4 or 5 feet tall.

I didn't have my camera, nor Francois, so I didn't take any pictures, though Sarah got one of each of us with her film camera.

Second day training

10:22am IST Monday 10 October 2005

Legal:

Three distinct legal systems exist within Israel/Palestine. Legal system encompasses laws / police force / judges / court houses / jails / etc. One for Israelis, one for Palestinians, one for internationals

Israeli system is a civil system; its people have rights, and the police are police.

Palestinian system is a military system; its people have few rights, and the police are soldiers. The prisons are tents behind barbed wire and chicken wire. Easy to expand and difficult to say "it's too full."

International system is new; detention centers are old hotels (in some cases). Developed by the Ministry of the Interior. It's basically for deportation, and started when the West bank was closed in April 2002 and Israel had to import workers from 3rd world countries.

10:41am IST Monday 10 October 2005

remember these regulations and rules that apply to me today:

We no longer have to be proved guilty to be deported.

All they need to deport me: a hearing with no lawyer, no burden of proof, just issue a deportation order, and a right to appeal being held until my deportation, but no chance to win the appeal, and no chance to appeal the deportation.

Nowadays we will not likely be deported unless we try (or have tried) changing our name to get in, or straightup lie to the system, or break conditions that we previously signed.

11:40am IST Monday 10 October 2005

if we are arrested now:

We could be held up to 24 hours

given conditions for release

release

probably not deported

bring us to a judge, who can only do the same things: release or release with conditions.

Might be denied entry next time I try to enter the country

What if I speak Japanese?

Should we pack before acting?

1:43pm IST Monday 10 October 2005

tactics:

Sit down: this holds our ground and is de-escalating

Distraction: going to a conflict sometimes

Absorption: pulling a soldier away from their target

Puppy piling: piling onto a soldiers' target

Linking up: grabbing each other makes it harder to be arrested

Regrouping: after the issue is over

weapons:

Sound bombs: look like grenades but only plastic shrapnel

Tear gas: makes us feel like we can't breathe, and causes tears. We can still breathe; onion or vinegar soaked rags help breathing. Swim goggles are great to protect the eyes. Wearing contact lenses causes huge problems with tear gas.

Wash about a half hour after being gassed.

Rubber bullets: two types are used, buckshot and sniper. Turn around and cover neck and ears.

Live rounds: deadly. Get down and find cover. Stay.

2:45pm IST Monday 10 October 2005

We just did a role play of soldiers trying to push back a group and arrest a Palestinian.

Self care:

A lot of the stuff we'll see could be emotionally traumatic. These are not normal situations and lots of things can trigger emotional response.

Eat well. There's a lot to do, but don't forget to eat.

Sleep well. Sometimes we have long long days of actions, then have to write reports. Adrenaline can only take us so far.

Take a break after seeing really wack stuff or after working a while.

Post traumatic stress disorder happens to some ISM participants, so get contact information of other ISMers and get professional help if necessary.

Give yerself some time to chill when going back home. Don't just jump back into work or try to set up a speaking engagement or keep the momentum going.

3:44pm IST Monday 10 October 2005

language:

Ahterem halak: lit. 'respect yourself' good for stopping begging, theft, or sexual harassment

Chalas:

Men should be the ones to greet other men; women should not greet first as it will be seen as flirtation or invitation.

4:06pm IST Monday 10 October 2005

Emergency procedures:

If someone is killed or injured badly:

call the ambulance (usually 101)
stay with the person, but don't try to move them, depending on injury
call ISM media office
re-group; check others' responses
* agree on story as seen from various points of view
* choose contact person for media

4:16pm IST Monday 10 October 2005

I recognize I'm not ready to become active yet.

So...

6:55am IST Tuesday 11 October 2005

So, during the day a gnawing set of ruminations wandered through my brain. They boiled down to one question: "is I is or is I ain't pickin' olives?"

Specific variants included fears about my personal safety, wanting to see what's up with Palestinian Vision (the NGO through which I met Niveen), etc etc. Basically I'm being wishywashy.