Entries this day: Tired

Tired

9:37pm MAGT Monday 20 March 2006 (day 13144)

Man. I'm tired.

Today... today today today, um...

Yesterday I didn't see Eri all day, which seemed a bit surprising, but when I thought back, there were certainly many days that I didn't see her before I liked her more than just "she's pretty." Today while I was talking to Hiromi and Keiko (I think those are their names; I met them early in the voyage as the girls who always asked about Francois. Their friend Keiko(? (I think there are two Keikos involved in the trio)) repaired Francois' leg) in Yacht Club, Eri came through to get water.

I said ひさしぶり, and she sorta smiled I think, but that may be wishful thinking; she didn't say anything. Zzing, straight to the heart; what is going on in my head????

Went downstairs and chilled in GET Room 3, and Kentaro happened by; we traded namaste-smiles and I said, "I am experiencing a broken heart," and he was like, "really? right now?"

"yeah," and I summarized the story, without much context, just: "she has a boyfriend, which should be the end of the story, but I got to like her, then today she didn't really acknowledge me, so.."

He smiled; "I think you should just feel those emotions. I guess."

"Yeah; that's what I guessed, too."

- - - -

Heard from the video team: it basically looks like they will be able to do the movie, and we can just chill out and not worry about it. I'm hopin' it will be alllll goood.

We (video team teachers) are super duper fuckin' lucky if the video team pulls it together with such limited input from us. Wow.

- - - -

I repaired my sandal today, but broke a needle in the process. I used the piece of dental floss I've been using for a while. Stabbed my thumb with the back end of the needle; I had been using some cardboard as a thimble, but it suddenly stabbed through the cardboard and into my thumb. That fuckin' hurt.

- - - -

Ran around getting Speech Contest titles together.

- - - -

Met with Akane, but didn't go over my speech; too tired of doing that, and I'm sure she was getting bored of it. Talked about random stuff in Japanese, but didn't really have a "lesson" as such; she went off to talk to a boy; I don't know details.

- - - -

GET Meeting was in Sunshine Bar, much to Matt's surprise, and very short.

- - - -

Rubbed Kellie's back and shoulders while she sat in front of me on a deck chair on the pool deck. We are both horny (can I say that on here?) and frustrated. Yargh.

- - - -

Speedy-chowed Japanese style food in Topaz today; I played the Topaz Lottery (go in alone and hope to be seated next to someone interesting) and lost, but go out basically in time to meet Fantastic Rabbits in Hemmingway at 8pm. Didn't get dessert in Topaz though.

- - - -

FRabbits got drinks and we chatted and decided what we would do for our last class tomorrow; they are going to come visit Fighting Goats at the end of their class and plan a time for a double-class party; I hope it will be enteraining for all involved.

Near the end of our chat, Rie (Carol) seemed to be defending herself against the rest of the class, saying that she didn't like me, but I don't really know if that was the core of their discussion. She did flirt with me a bit.

Goodness knows she's cute, and I've fancied getting close to her, but I doubt we'd be able to communicate well, and I'm sure I/she would get tired of her/my abrupt nature when we're annoyed.

- - - -

Now it's time for the Bulgarian night to begin; I want to see the beautiful Slavena and Kremena, but I've also got to go to bed, but I've also got to work on Speech Contest, but I've also said I would go to newspaper at 10:30.

1:03am MAGT Tuesday 21 March 2006

Bulgarian night was sparsely attended at first, but seemed to pick up after a bit. They gave free homemade bread. I left at 10:30 and went to newspaper.

- - - -

Frustration / jealousy at the way they are bypassing the five perfectly good title images I drew in favor of titles that match a theme for that particular day. Jealousy because Akane (my favorite teacher) was getting to draw the title image for the day after tomorrow while there is a clear posting: NO MORE TITLE IMAGES; WE HAVE PLENTY.

I dug into the feelings and recognized that I was taking it to mean my images weren't good enough. But I know they are, if only because I made each of them with lovin' care. Got a photo of them and bequeathed them to タモちゃん, who has been instrumental in getting me involved in the paper at all.

I was getting a bit frustrated at her at first for not accepting my shoddy work on the 小タイトル today, but then I realized it was at least as difficult for her to try and explain to me in English how I should change the image. She did quite well.

I lost patience again though when she was trying to explain that though they were good, all my five remaining title images can't be used because there are only 10 days in the voyage; and she was looking up words like "compromise" and "consideration" and I was like, jesus; I fucking understand, but said something like, "I know these are good; I made them [with love and care]. If you don't want to use them, that is fine. I just want to take a picture of them, and I'll be happy."