Entries this day: Before_Clairvision_soml Extension,_Visa ctbriefs.net work

Before Clairvision soml

2:08pm JST Monday 4 February 2008 (day 13830)

Not sure how much I'll be able to write before lunch ends here at work.

I'm reading some definitions in ClairVision, and at first it began to smell like a religion, but now I can see that it's like spiritual science, and beginning to encroach on a lot of the things I had already determined 'must be true' about "reality."

So, I sorta wanna capture my personal spiritual beliefs before I'm swayed much by this system.

Oh, and it's a new month, so this is a perfect time for a state of my life address.

I'm going to change this entry name from Before ClairVision to Before ClairVision soml

Okay, I think it will now show up in SOML type entries.

State of my (Spiritual) Life Address

1. I discount Christianity and religions with teachings from an old book because if God is real, then God can talk to me right now, and doesn't need a book. I just need to tune in to God directly.

2. I ignore any religion that says I must "bow down before God" or whatever because "God is so much better," etc. I anti-believe the concept that God wants me to believe I'm a sinner and kiss God's ass for God to accept me into Heaven. To that, I say, "whateva."

   BECAUSE, if God is God, then God doesn't need to be praised. God has no ego to be stroked. Equating God to an old guy in the clouds who is watching earth with infinite knowledge and jotting down everything we do wrong is just silly.

3. God, being "-infinitely-" grander than we can possibly conceive, leaves a lot of room "between" us and God. By that, I mean what's been quoted as something like, "any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic," (and by that token, "any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a Miracle") implies that any sufficiently advanced civilization could masquerade as gods, and we humans wouldn't know the difference.

   Therefore, why should I think that the "miracles" of 2000 - 3000 years ago were anything but aliens teasing / taunting us? There are humans who can go into states of no pulse and no breath for extended periods of time. Why not for three days chillin' in a tomb?

4. With a quietening of my mind/brain, I can reach states of consciousness that I equate to being able to communicate with my angels. For example, I ask questions (basically simply formulate questions) and have the answers immediately. The voice of my angels is one of utter patience, utter love, utter wisdom.

   I don't know that it's really an angel or my angel, but the resulting information has always led me away from dangers and toward goodness.

5. Once I asked how long I would be alive in this body, and I got the answer of multiple hundreds of years. Hmmm.

6. Good and Bad are relative terms.

7. We humans are running around on earth, basically trying not to die and trying to figure out what's going on.

   Here are some things that I've thought were going on:

   1. Around high school, I realized that emotions must be important. They stick with me until I experience them. Even if I don't remember what caused the emotion, I can experience the emotion years and years later with perfect clarity. After that experience, the emotion is (partially) released (until I experience the whole emotion).

   2. Later, I came across the concept that we are bits of God inhabiting these monkey bodies, pretending that we are not part of God so that we can have the experience of fear, aloneness, worry, etc. God can't experience fear because God is pure love. But God may wonder, "hmmm; I wonder what I am, but I can't know if I don't know what it's like to be what I'm not." and here we are, little experiential agents of God, taking notes for God to collect when we're done.

   3. I anti-believe in the concept of sin. But I do believe in a concept of karma. I think that if we kick/scream/fight/kill our way through life, we tie ourselves to each other. If I maliciously kill you, I attach part of myself to you and have to find you later to apologize. I think this happens automatically in the etheric/astral realms, without intervention from God, who loves us no matter what we do.

      Along these lines, I came up with a theory: love is slippery / releasing, and fear is sticky / capturing.

   4. Space is far too big for just the inhabitants of earth. There's got to be myriad other civilizations, at all levels of maturity and in all variety of forms.

   5. Because of karma, civilizations not on earth ought not get involved with our evolution.

      But certainly there are civilizations that don't care about karma, and why not civilizations that are unaffected by karma?

   6. I've heard that Buddha reached a moment in meditation where he became aware of 99,000 lifetimes, and they were but a fraction of the whole.

      I think I heard Ram Das (sp) say that we live enough lifetimes that if a bird holding a silk scarf were to fly past a mountain once for each lifetime, the abrasive action of the silk would wear the mountain down by the time we are done. (sumpin' like dat)

   7. Quite recently, I heard that "life on earth is addictive," which tends to have souls get stuck here time after time, trying to get things right.

      It's an interesting idea, but I don't have any "proof," except, of course, that I have a huge sense that I'm going to achieve spiritual perfection this lifetime. (hahaha. (no, really.))

   8. I've read some alien conspiracy theories that aliens faked all the bible stuff to make us feel inferior to God and "behave" (in a way that makes us fight over resources (which would be infinite if used wisely) and produce negative (emotional) energy which the aliens collect (for food or currency))

      Not sure I believe that per se, but it can explain a lot of what I see around me.

8. I have had the experience of consciously existing outside of my body (all except for my head) so I therefore believe I am more than this physical body. For this reason I don't fear death (though perhaps not looking forward to the pain if I have a painful experience leading to death).

   (also because of the multiple hundreds of years of life thing mentioned above.)

9. I broke my head in 1995 or so. Rebecca told me that while I was unconscious, my angels told me what I should be doing this lifetime, and though I don't consciously remember it, when I'm ready, I can go into meditation and ask them to tell me again.

   Because I didn't die from that head breaking moment (the doctors said I probably would die, (and then over a period of 4 days changed their prognosis from death to coma, then brain damage, then inability to walk, then nevermind)) I surmised that I must be here to do something.

   Within a year (?) of that injury, I met Diane who said on that coming Friday she was hosting a palm reading party. At the time she told me, I knew I would be at the party, though we didn't say anything at the time. That Thursday she called me saying there had been a cancellation and invited me to join (at no charge). The palm reader (Richard Unger) told people "you're here to be a good parent," "you're here to be a psychologist," "you're here to learn how to control perception of other people's emotions,".. and then to me he said, "your job is to build something for the world."

   I started to cry, because I knew he was going to say something big, but not quite that big. ;-)

10. I did the Gateway Voyage at Monroe Institute in March 1996. I expected I would be a pro, floating outside of my body, chillin' with other spirits, etc. I had nothing like that as a conscious experience (though at one point I did cry over the plight of a under appreciated grain of sand in the sidewalk).

    I got back home and told Char (who would always watch my crown chakra as we talked). I told her what had happened, and she read my crown chakra saying, "oh you will be able to astral travel; in fact, that will just be the beginning."

11. Recently, I told the above stories to Helma in terms of my driving desire to be "perfect." She agreed that I was taking on a great deal of pressure by locking on to those stories, and so, though at one level I want her to continue feeding my ego, she added nothing to these predictions.

Extension, Visa

1:06pm JST Monday 4 February 2008 (day 13830)

I got my visa extended and changed from teachin' to programmin'. Now I'm eligible for most any computer job in the country. Sweet.

On the extension thing, there was a little blank for how long I wanted to extend.

I jotted down three years to see what they would say.

- - - -

But even more interesting than that (at least in the short term): I turned in the paperwork and sat down to wait and shifted to meditation. During my meditation, they blocked off the windows for their lunch time. I was like, "hmmm; should I go for lunch as well, or just wait meditate? Decided to stay, and within a couple minutes, the guy came out and explained:

"Blah blah blah blah (see ya in three years)"

word.

ctbriefs.net

11:08pm JST Monday 4 February 2008 (day 13830)

Finished the beta version of Conspiracy Theory Briefs today. The last step was getting the pagination to work. Though it's not yet visible, it will be as soon as the 11th entry is entered. Next steps are allowing people to set the number of theories per page and to allow admin to ban users, and oh, I need to add the code that will automatically mark theories as spam if enough people vote them that way. It should be easy to write that code; I just need to decide the numbers. Perhaps I can make it as simple as 10 spam votes = spam, but I also want to take into consideration the number of non-spam votes.

something like, if the number of spam votes is at least 6 *and* more than double the number of actual votes, then it's spam.

That works, so at minimum there would be only 2 Y/N votes and 6 spam votes. I guess that would be pretty clearly spam.

Plus, I'll be monitoring during the early stages, so I can tweak the numbers as appropriate.

work

11:14pm JST Monday 4 February 2008 (day 13830)

Good work related news items:

1. They're talking about putting me on the insurance plan (50% on the monthly payment, and 30% deductible for services)

2. I will get paid for the three days of work I did in Kagoshima (despite the fact that I had to move the code offline cause it broke the ability for the admin to send mail).

3. Three years' work visa baby.