Entries this day: AMs No_answer PM

AMs

9:26am JST Thursday 9 October 2008 (day 14078)

Yesterday morning and this morning I woke up around 7am, did reiki, neti, and meditation. Though I haven't done my meditation yet today, I'm about to right now.

9:47am JST

Done. At this stage, my mind seems to wander for well more than half the time that I'm seated for meditation. I can pull it back to meditative awareness for perhaps 30 seconds at a time every couple or five or ten minutes.

No answer

2:25pm JST Thursday 9 October 2008 (day 14078)

Good grief. Romi has just called me to say that she heard from her friend, who apparently heard from Yazawa, who was apparently upset/offended/taken-aback/surprised that I had, in (my version of) Romi's (version of her friend's verison of Yazawa's) words, "charged her for counseling," even though, as I mentioned in said email, I don't have a plaque on my wall.

So I've replied to her directly as below:

HI Yazawaさん

I received a phone call from my friend Romi, through whom I was introduced to you.

Given that I haven't heard from you directly, I won't guess your intention, but she said my most
recent email caused some concern for you.

So, as we agreed during our phone call on Monday 6 October, I'll give the books back this week
(tomorrow), and you can pay 10,000 for my time spent on writing the reports.

   Thanks!
    - Rob


On Wed, Oct 8, 2008 at 7:54 AM, Rob Nugen <rob@robnugen.com> wrote:
>> I change my mind because your questions shook my subconsicous mind over the
>> night and made me realize
>> that I do not need to submit the reports done by someone else. I am the
>> same even if I do not submit the reports.
>> I do not need to prove anything to anyone. I am who I am and what I am with
>> the reports or without the reports.
>
> Excellent!   Congratulations.
>
>> That's the reason to change my mind and I believe it is very importnt that
>> I stick to my understanding.
>
> I agree.
>
> The types of questions I asked you when we met are part of what I call
> my freestyle healing (massage, reiki, counseling)...  I'm  glad my
> questions were able to help you find more of your true self.  You are
> who you are with or without writing reports.   :-)
>
> When we spoke on the phone after your realization, I felt angry, only
> because I didn't understand the reasoning behind your change.  I asked
> for payment for my time spent on the reports.  本当は、I don't care about
> that time spent.
>
> But as part of *my* growth process, I want to shift my source of
> income from computer work to my healing practice.  I have spent years
> practicing massage with my friends, and counseling in my men's group,
> so I know I can do it, but I don't have a certificate on the wall from
> a school.
>
> Would you help support my freestyle healing practice?   Whatever
> amount of money the questions and resulting realization is worth to
> you, perhaps the same price as one of your hypnotherapy sessions...
>
> I have attached a photo of the inside cover of my bank book.
>
>   Thanks!
>    - Rob
>

-- 
Freestyle art and healing
rob@robnugen.com

WTF didn't she ask me directly? Her English is fine. My communication to her has been clear.

Part of me wants to just say fuckit and not get paid for my time at all. But fuck that; we had an agreement that she broke, and this is the second agreement. I'm not going to unnecessarily hurt myself financially by giving up on it.

7:15pm JST

Finally, an answer:

Hi Rob,

As a Japanese I made my reply too beautifull in order to be courtious.

I always get a positive learning even from the negative/unpleasent experience.

There was  no rapport  when we met and talked. At least I felt so.
When there is no rapport, you can not go ahead with the project.
You can not fully trust the person.

When I get the books, I will deposit the money into your account.

Thanks,

Nobue

My reply:

HI Nobue!

Thank you for your honest answer.  I definitely appreciate that.  As
planned, I will send the books tomorrow.

I'm surprised to hear you're considering this an unpleasant
experience.  You've just saved 110,000 yen!  :-)

 Have a good night
  - Rob!

I wanted to say, "by being untrustworthy, you've just saved 110,000 yen!"

- - - -

And, I must admit: I bet she's going to try to hire someone else to do these papers for her. If so,..... that's unbelievable. But I guess I'll never know fo' sho'. I want so bad to catch her in a lie, but my higher self says it's not worth my time. Just give her the books back and run away.

PM

8:59pm JST Thursday 9 October 2008 (day 14078)

Started to leave work a bit after 8, decided to wait for a train where I could get a seat (simply by being (among the) first in line), and am now on the train, still chillin' in Shibuya station.

On the way to the station, I saw four girls wearing bowling pin costumes, so I had to stop to get a pic of them with Uncle Cow. Said, "亜美ち、チョッッッと待って下さい。ユーカウの写真写真をとらなきゃ。"

(I don't know the kanji for "take" (a picture).)

Called Ami back but didn't tell her about the picture, so she can see it with a fresh mind tomorrow.

I'm considering going early tomorrow to Nobue's house to hand deliver the books. I probably won't do that cause I'm gonna get home late tonight and not wanna get up that early in the morning (would have to be early enough to get back to Krispy Kreme to meet Tariq at 9:45am. I mean it's not OMG early, but it's possible. But in the end, the reason I'd be doing it is just self-victimizing, so with that POV, I'm not going to do it. I'll just take them to the local くろねこ tonight.