Entries this day: Dream Work meditation

Dream

8:16am JST Tuesday 2 December 2008 (day 14132)

During the middle of the day, I walked by a spooky door in a huge tree which I had seen before, but hadn't realized it was unlocked! I pushed it open warily, as it was the entrance to a haunted house (of the carnival variety). Using my umbrella as a proxy, I waved it around inside, the entrance, trying to set of any motion detectors that would be used to shout loud noises or monsters at the visitor.

Nothing happened in the entry, so I opened the door fully and stepped inside, seeing two doors on either side of the entry where monsters were certainly hiding. I whapped the doors loudly with my umbrella, but still no reaction. Shook it all around and finally found a switch that turned on a light, though it was a mere few watts. I was surprised to think that this little bit of light could actually scare someone, but at night, those watts would have much great effect against the darkness than sunlight.

I turned around to see a huge frankenstein head looking in the window of the front door where I had entered, and I waved my umbrella at it to say 'I see you!' and the guy took off the mask and was like, "hey how's it goin?" cause he could see I could see and wasn't particularly scared.

He suggested I look more closely at the human heads sticking up from the walls on the doors I had been whapping before. I inspected one of them: a female face with perfect hair and beautiful features. I was like, "it's totally beautiful," and then the head began to move and the woman whose head I had complimented stood up out of her position in the haunted house. I jokingly continued to refer to her as "it," "OMG how did you get it to sit there so long?" and she was like, "HI," and he second girl was like, "don't you think I'm beautiful too?" and I said, "HI" then "I'll get to that in a second," and then back to the first girl, "I'm so sorry I was banging so loudly with my umbrella, but I'm so impressed that I got no reaction from you whatsoever!" and she looked over at her friend who was getting up from her position as well, "yes, I think it was your turn to spook the visitor..." she said casually, and I sorta got a sense of what it must be like to have this as a job.

Wondering how I should say, "no I'm not really attracted to you," to the second girl, but who was generally speaking an attractive woman, just not for me, I realized she had just been joking with her commment, so I didn't say anything.

Work

9:31pm JST Tuesday 2 December 2008 (day 14132)

(written 10:55am JST Wednesday 3 December 2008 (day 14133))

work shmerk

meditation

11pm JST Tuesday 2 December 2008 (day 14132)

(written 10:11am JST Wednesday 3 December 2008 (day 14133))

Meditation last night seemed to bring a unique experience. In the past I have found a way of quieting my brain that feels a bit like relaxing the muscles in my temples and then all thoughts cease. If I focus on keeping my temples relaxed, I can detect and release thoughts before they fully manifest into some focus-grabbing thoughts or images.

Recently, while reading _Eat, Love, Pray_, in the part about "give your mind pure love," I tried this, and the same relaxed feeling resulted. Basically like "oh, another way to say what I'm doing with this temple relaxation is giving my mind pure love."

maybe

But, in any case, it seems to work, and last night as I focused on the idea of giving my brain pure love, I felt the relaxation and a bit of a deeper relaxation, like my muscles were happy to slide off my face if only my skin would let them, or perhaps my consciousness could just fly away if only I could release the thought that I need to find some way to do this.

I was nearly able to maintain this state of awareness for the fully twenty minutes I had planned to meditate, and then I began to get some visual images that I previously have associated with "dreaming," and more recently have noticed corresponded with my 'forgetting' my meditative consciousness, but last night were nearly visible *while* I was aware of my meditative consciousness. Sortof a forget-see-images-remember-images-go-fuzzy, like if I tried to look at them they became fuzzy, but if I just experienced them, they were clear.

Sumpin' like that.

Then by the time 20 minutes was up I was flat ready to zonk out. I lay down and was surprised that I couldn't bring up the temple-relaxation/love/consciousness at all. Just awake or zzzz.